Do you want to ask a special little girl in your life to be the flower girl for your upcoming wedding? If so, then let’s explore all about this sweet tradition so that you can feel confident that she will feel honored to say yes and want to help you celebrate on your big day.
A common question that brides ask when thinking their wedding party is “How do you ask a girl to be your flower girl?” You see, in this day and age, it is not just planned behind the scenes between the bride and the child’s parents, like it was in the past.
Instead, you will see that it is most acceptable to give a small gift or card with a proposal letter directly to the little girl so that she can feel included in the decision-making process. On the proposal card, you can write a beautiful little verse or rhyming poem that talks about why you want to offer her this special job and asks the question, “Will you be my flower girl?”
A few examples of some prose that may feel right for your proposal letter are listed below, but even more unique is to simply write your own. “To a beautiful girl who is more special than you know
It’s such a joy to have seen you laugh and grow
You’re part of our family and have won over my heart
And as my journey continues I need your help with one part I have a favor to ask. I hope YES is what you say. Will you be my flower girl on my wedding day?”
“When I was a little girl, about the size of you I dreamed one day I’d fall in love and then get married, too So now that I am all grown up and about to be a bride I want for you to be my flower girl right by my side For it is common knowledge that a wedding’s not complete Without a pretty flower girl, so dear to us and sweet.”
Roses are red, Violets are blue
We need a sweet flower girl and we want her to be YOU!
If you want to incorporate a small gift with your proposal card, consider adding a small bracelet, a ring pop, hair ties, flowers, a princess crown, a special book, or balloons with your proposal letter. Little girls love small tokens like these and these work well with various bits of clever poetry that match with the gift.
Perfect for Knotted Hair Ties: “Will you be our flower girl and help us tie the knot?” Perfect for Friendship Wish Bracelets:
“Tie this bracelet on your wrist, then make a special wish
When your bracelet frays in two, then your special wish may come true. Will you be our flower girl?”
Perfect for a princess crown: “I can’t say ‘I do” without a little princess like you. Will you be our flower girl?” In the proposal, you may want to talk about what her flower girl duties will include: “Will you be my aisle dancing, bridesmaid helping, petal tossing,
How can you build excitement for the big day? Even if you don’t add the duties into the proposal letter, it is always a good idea to clearly outline to your flower girl just what her special job includes. Help her feel the excitement by showing her what her dress and shoes will look like. Talk to her about her hair will be fixed for the wedding. Give her a chance to practice with her basket of flower petals. Consider having her pose for a mini-photo shoot in her outfit so that she has special photos to remember the day that she had the big job of being a flower girl.
What is the right flower girl age? Little girls of all ages can be asked to be a flower girl and there is no right or wrong answer to this question. Probably the most common age range is between 3-7, simply because they are big enough to understand the instructions that they need to follow, but are still young enough to be carefree and thrilled to be the center of attention in their role.
However, don’t hesitate to ask a younger or older child if they are special to you and would be a perfect fit as a flower girl for your wedding. As long as they are big enough to walk and follow simple instructions, a very young flower girl is perfectly acceptable. Older flower girls who are not too self-conscious also make great candidates as they will embrace this role with poise and grace. If the girl you want to ask is just a bit too old to be a flower girl (such as a pre-teen), you may want to consider asking her to be a junior bridesmaid, instead. More than anything, try to choose a flower girl that truly wants to say YES and will be excited to be throwing her petals and prancing down the aisle. If your flower girl is very shy or timid then you might need the answer to the next question...
What if my flower girl won’t walk down the aisle? In order to get her as comfortable as possible, always have her practice multiple times before the wedding. If there is a wedding rehearsal scheduled, make sure she is there and gets a chance to get familiar with her role. If she handles practice well, then chances are she will do fine on the big day.
But if she does get cold feet or stage fright, have one of her parents coax her gently or invite her to walk down with the ring bearer so that she doesn’t feel so alone. Remember that even an outgoing flower girl might clam up when she sees all the guests on the day of the wedding. If she doesn’t make it all the down the aisle, don’t let anyone make her feel bad. Everyone loves flower girls, no matter what happens.
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What about thanking my flower girl after the wedding? This extra step is a great idea that simply includes sending a cute thank you card and a small gift to her expressing what a great job she did. Little girls always love recognition of this nature and it gives you a wonderful chance to express your appreciation. I hope these flower girl ideas help you prepare for your wedding, eases your anxiety, and gives you confidence to ask the all-important question “Will you be my flower girl?”